Optimist: The glass is half-full

Pessimist: The glass is half-empty

Literist: The glass cannot be half-empty nor half-full. These are absolute descriptors and attempts to fractionate their definitions are ignorant and meaningless. The glass has realized one-half of its potential.

Joe Biden, American president: "Restore faith in government"

Frank-Walter Steinmeier, German president: "Crisis of trust"

Free societies exist only when there is an appropriate distrust of government.

As if I didn't have enough to deal with, I bought some food that was labelled "Store in a cool, dry place."

I installed a disco ball in the pantry.

A new study reports changes to a person's ventral medial prefrontal cortex (brain) when that person identifies with fictional characters, indicative of the person incorporating the fictional characters' attributes into their own personality, to a degree greater than those of real people.

If I expect you to call me The Dark Lord, just go with it. It's legit.

Two Minnesota legislators have submitted a bill to rename a portion of a highway after Prince.

I'm not sure if my suggestion of "The Highway Formerly Known as Five" will make it out of committee.

If there's something more annoying than people who don't know the difference between your and you're, it's screenwriters who don't know the difference between extortion and blackmail.

"Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled peppers"

How did the peppers get pickled before he picked them?

This is the type of communist propaganda that brings down societies.

The CDC issued guidance today recommending that fully vaccinated people continue wearing masks.

If this is truly based on scientific merit (and not a control measure as been alleged), it means that vaccinated people can still be contagious and there is no such thing as herd immunity.

But it's the government – they're used to having it both ways.

People are upset about this Potato Head thing – but when I call someone a shithead, I seldom take the time to attach a gender-specific honorific.

They say federal jobs are pretty cushy.

I think I'll apply for email carrier.

"I'm happy to take questions if that's what I'm supposed to do, Nance. Whatever you want me to do." – Joe Biden, 3/3/3021 at virtual presser.

I've said in the past that Nancy Pelosi doesn't need to run for president because she is already the most powerful woman in the country and coasts to 30% margins of victory every two years.

But now it seems she is actually running the presidency.

Without specific explanation, Dr. Seuss Enterprises announced it will stop publishing and licensing six Dr. Seuss titles for portrayals that are 'hurtful and wrong'.

At this writing, Dr. Seuss titles account for nine of the top ten best selling books at Amazon.

Well played, Dr. Seuss Enterprises.

(None of the top ten titles are on the verboten list).

HEADLINE: "CPAC Orlando: Trump hints at running again in 2024 as a Republican, but only 68% of attendees agree"

Not news, news-like product – in any other context, 68% favorability is a landslide.

Is not the real story the revelation that Trump remains the front-runner among conservatives? This can't bode well for the GOP. 

American positions in Iraq were attacked last week, so the U.S. attacked Syria this week.

Aren't you glad things are back to normal?

Some people have a hard time believing Joe Biden won 81,283,098 votes.

Joe failed to capture ~157,216,902 votes.

~78,866,604 people didn't vote for any of the clowns in the circus.

Khalid Sheikh Mohammed, the asserted mastermind behind 9/11, has been detained in Gitmo for eighteen years.

The administration's rationale for offering the COVID-19 vaccine to Gitmo PoW's (ahead of most Americans) is to "expedite the legal process".

I dream of someday having a government that – if not fair and just – is at least competent enough to foist cogent lies upon the people.

If the government were truly interested in carbon-free transportation, it would release the findings from the investigation of the gravity wave powered craft at Area 51.

Bill Gates is in a five billion dollar bidding war for a private jet company that operates 1,600,000 flights per year.

Gates' book How to Avoid a Climate Disaster: The Solutions We Have and the Breakthroughs We Need will hit the shelves next month.

It's nice to know where the little people stand.